I think in the beginning, when your world is still spinning and your morphing into this entirely new version of yourself, you take for granted the gloriousness of a contact nap with your babe. As your baby grows older and older, and contact naps become few and far between, to none, you realize how much you miss them. I will never forget in the beginning feeling such absolute love and admiration at the beginning of a contact nap. Then about a half hour in wishing I had put my phone just a little bit closer to my hand. And my water bottle. And maybe the remote, too. Then feeling really stuck and wondering when he'd wake up. Looking back on those two and three hour contact naps, though, I wouldn't change it for the world. I wish they still happened.
There are so many sleep training coaches and videos and Instagram posts that will tell you contact naps are a big no no. They need to get used to their crib and sleep in their bassinet and contact naps ruin this. It couldn't be more untrue. You would think that the amount of contact naps Jack had in the beginning of his life, coupled with the amount of times we let him sleep in bed with us (another big no no) that he'd not be an "independent sleeper" as they call it. Jack was sleeping in his bassinet since birth and his crib by six weeks. Whilst throwing in contact naps and bed sharing as needed. Contact naps are not evil, they are nurturing. They teach your baby connection. Such an important tool in life.
I'm actually sad to say that, before today, I can't remember the last contact nap that I even shared with my son. Maybe sometime in the summer. The reason for me writing this today, actually, is because, for the first time in months and months, Jack did not want to sleep in his crib for nap. Two hours late for nap today (some weekends you can't control that) I'd thought he'd pass right out. Nope. After lots of tears, I cradled him in my arms and sat on the rocking chair with him, immediately he passed out. His head nestled so sweetly in my neck, his arms wrapped around my torso. My initial thought was, "well I guess I'm not getting anything done for a couple hours" but then I stopped myself and thought, "when was the last time we'd done this?" And then I started crying a little. Because I couldn't really remember. And then I thought about how fast he's growing and changing and learning new skills and that it's all just too fast.
Everyone says it. "It goes so fast. Don't blink". Until you're in it, living it, you don't realize how fast it truly goes. I am the type of mama who tries my best to soak in every single moment I can with my son (work totally gets in the way of this part, ugh). Every minute I can be, I want to be enjoying this time with Jack. While he is still this little, and still wants to sleep with mama, I will let him. While he still grabs my hand and pulls himself on my lap to read him the 50th book of the night, I will let him. While he still thinks peek a boo is the funniest thing he's ever done, I'll do it over and over again until my eyes fall out.
No, contact naps are not bad, they don't teach your child bad sleep habits. They are therapeutic for baby and you. So if you're a mama with a newborn or young infant right now and feel like the only way you can get your little one to sleep right now is a contact nap, please embrace this. If you're thinking, "Oh, they fell asleep on me, but I'll put them down in the bassinet so I can go do the dishes or the laundry" don't (you know they'll wake right up anyways once you lay them down-that's motherhood). Stay right there and soak this in. Because there will be a day where they don't need this anymore, and it will be a very bittersweet day. Mostly sad if you're anything like me.
xo Courtney
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